Coming Of Age Draft

I was always that girl that got picked last in groups. The one who was classified as the “silent one” as you would put it. Who would do things by herself because she was too scared to know what other people thought. Good or bad. The one who always tried to stay out of people’s way so she wouldn’t be the center of attention. Matter of fact, I was the complete opposite of being social, I was the reserved one.

My life was basically a boring library book. One that would be looked at then looked away from to be put back on a library shelf. I would go to class, learn some stuff, then leave to my next class and do the same. For recess and lunch you ask? I dreaded those periods. I would occasionally ask myself if the BOE put those two periods up just to torture me. I never really had anywhere to go except to classrooms that were open. And if they weren’t, I would go to the library. But what would happen if the library was closed as well? My last resort was the lonely tree at the end of the field nobody would go to because it was so far away. People would probably think I was breaking one of the schools rules to be soliciting in a non designated area. Though according to the school rules in the planner, it was only behind buildings. And this one afternoon was where it all started as I started to slowly break out of my lonely turtle shell that shielded out the world for me.

            It was one afternoon when all my safe havens were closed and I had to resort to the tree in the field. It gave me a nice view of people playing, socializing, and even dancing on the very large field of grass basking in the suns warmth. While I just sat there on the newly mowed grass doing my usual thing. Reading and getting started on assignments that are due next class. And while I sat there, I realized the fun in what the other people were doing and comparing them to my thing and what I do mostly everyday. The difference? They were having fun. I wasn’t. I was bored out of my mind solving for "X" and reasons why Max bought 23 apples and insisted on sharing half with his buddy, Jorge, so they were equal. So I thought to myself, why am I like this? This wasn’t a lifestyle, it was a choice. A choice that I made. And a choice that could be changed. Which was why I packed my stuff in my bag, got out of my tree shade, and joined a group of girls from my advisory class and socialized.

            At first, it wasn’t easy being that I was new at socializing with people I don’t normally talk to on a daily basis. So it took a while. And after  weeks, I kind of got used to their presence. They would include me in everything they did. Whether it was to one of their houses or just some after school chilling, they changed my social habits. I got used to standing or presenting in my classes whenever asked, greeted people I knew from my other classes who also returned the favor, and even participated in events the school organized.

            After a couple months I realized, I wasn’t that shy lonely girl anymore. Instead of being known as the quiet one in my classes, I was pretty much the loudest one in most. I would socialize so much I would even get busted for it. Some people, even teachers, asked me what happened to me. Why I am the way I am now. Or what made me do it. The only answer I could really give them was pretty simple. I wanted a change that I would be happy about. And I don’t regret it one bit.